Wednesday, October 29, 2014

9 Tips You are a Perfectionist


The biggest misconception in life is that “all good things come from being perfect.” Nothing in life could be further from the truth. The truth is that perfection is the major killer of joy, creativity, happiness and also successYet there are millions of people who are driven every day to attain what is not possible … perfection.

Actually perfection is the cause of deep disappointment.

If you always strive to be perfect … reaching for the golden ring of life … you will only find nothing but emptiness, dissatisfaction and loneliness. At the end of your effort there is only a rusted old hoop. 

One of the most creative painters of modern time, Salvador Dali said, “Have no fear of perfection – you'll never reach it.” 

Over the years, I have noticed that the issue of perfectionism is huge with a lot of the people I have talked with. When I ask the question, “Are you a perfectionist?” 95% of the people answered with a resounding, “No!” After a few follow up questions from me, 80% of those 95% say, “Well, I guess I am.”  If you think about it, you will see that achievement, promotion, raises, and advancements are all based on how well you perform not whether you are a perfectionist.

By definition, a perfectionist is a person who strains compulsively and unceasingly toward an unattainable goal (or goals). The measuring stick for their self-worth is marked off by periods of productivity and feats of accomplishment. When you pressure yourself to achieve unrealistic goals, you predictably set yourself up for disappointment. Perfectionists tend to have the voice of a mean and judgmental critic in their head. It speaks up every time they fail to attain their own (or someone else’s) extremely unrealistic expectation.

So, how do you know if you are a perfectionist? You may be a perfectionist if you try to live by extremely unattainable standards, and you feel like a failure when you fail to meet them. You may be a perfectionist if your core beliefs about yourself tend to be punitive, rejecting, and downright nasty. You may be a perfectionist if the view you have of yourself tends to be tremendously negative. 

9 TIPS You Might Be a Perfectionist If:

1. You are always anxious, but you don’t know why.

2. You constantly doubt yourself.

3. You are continuously impatient.

4. You are fearful of the results if there is a chance you 
     might be wrong about something.

5. You procrastinate frequently.

6. You frequently stress over nothing.

7. You usually over-expect to the point of disappointment.

8. You under assess all your accomplishments, always 
     selling yourself short.

9. You often worry about how you will perform in the future.

Do you recognize any of these nine signs in yourself?

After Thoughts

Look at those signs again, and this time … only focus on the bold words while blocking out the rest. Do those words describe you? Is that how you feel and react every day? 

Here’s a suggestion to improve your mental and physical health … from here on out, let go of the concept of striving for perfection. Just be and do the best you can each day. Once you stop focusing on performing perfectly, then your creativity, joy, and happiness will come back in abundance.

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